Ain't No Mom Jeans

What To Wear To Look Hot at Your High School Reunion (without trying too hard)

Reader Question:

I'm attending my 25-year HS reunion in 2 months and am wondering what I should wear to the Dinner/Dance? I want to look hot without seeming like I'm trying too hard.

Answer:

Ah...yes.  The high school reunion.  Where you want to look totally, wildly hot...but in an effortless way.  Where you fend off compliments with a dismissive wave of your hand, "this old thing?  I've had it for years." 

So what to wear?  If you Google, "what to wear to your high school reunion", most of the advice centers on the little black dress.  LBDs are always appropriate for these types of events, and if you have one you love, go nuts.  However, the LBD isn't the most imaginative choice.  I'm assuming that you are writing in because you are looking for something beyond the obvious.

What To Wear Under Racerback Tops and Dresses

Reader Question:

Hi! First of all, I love your blog. It has truly helped me re-do my "mom-drobe" and get back to looking like a regular person.

I love these racer back tank tops (pictured at left from madewell.com), but I never know what to wear under them. I usually do a strapless bra, but I feel like I need something else because the arm holes are usually really big and reveal most of the bra, not to mention someone could sneak a peak at my back/belly flab :)

Should I layer another tank underneath? If so, does that have to be racer back as well, but tighter? Do I try to find a tube top or something? Help!

Thanks!!
-Julie

Answer:

Julie - LOVE your taste in tops.  I'm also a huge Madewell fan - a perfect place to look for non "mom-drobe" items.  And I think I'm going to have to steal your phrase "mom-drobe".  Look for it in future posts.  :)

In terms of what to put under a racerback....try one of the following strategies:

How to Pack for a Summer Post-Partum Road Trip (Or For Anyone Who Wants to Be Really, Really Comfortable While Traveling)

Reader Question:

Hello! I just had a baby 3 weeks ago. We are driving to Arizona June 30th to visit family. It will be a long road trip, with baby and my two other boys ages 6 & 8. My question is …..what do I wear?! I am severely postpartum and about a size 16/18 right now. My belly is still pretty flabby ( from my 8 year old? Haha) I want to be comfortable, but I refuse to  wear yoga pants or maternity gear! After following your site for awhile and agreeing with your style…I am hoping you can lend some advice!! I am usually very good at packing and putting together outfits, but this soon after baby has me mystified ;)
 
Shannon

Answer:

Wow, girl!!  A road trip, several weeks postpartum, with two boys and a baby!  Impressive.  Let's see if we can't figure out some insanely comfortable, yet stylish outfits for you to pack.

Reader Question: Denim Skirts For Moms?

Reader Question:

 Okay so I love love love your blog, your advice, and have a question! This summer I realized I officially hate shorts! With a passion! I hated them prior to the babe and hate them even more now. I do however, love skirts…especially Hard Tail roll-over ones - nothing more flattering on a tummy. My question though is what is a late-20s, mom-on-the-go, appropriate jean skirt? Much like you, I am a self proclaimed jean snob but shelling out $200.00 for AG’s Box Skirt (I’ve been stalking it and it never goes on sale) makes me, well more my husband, cringe. I refuse to do true minis but don’t know how I feel about running around in a denim pencil skirt at the playground. Any suggestions?

Thank you! xoxox

Julia

Answer:

Julia, thanks for writing in, and for your kind words on the blog!! 

The AG Box Skirt you mentioned (pictured at left) is adorable.  But how annoying that it's $200....I can get jeans for that price, and this skirt has roughly half the material!  Boooo!  

So.  You are looking for a jean skirt that is (reasonably) mom-friendly, and less than $200.  Got it.

The "less than $200" part is easy - there are a million options.  Finding something that's mom-friendly is a bit trickier -- I agree that running around the playground in a denim pencil skirt is...well...humph.  Not even sure how to describe.  Too fashion-victim?  Just plain scary?  I mean....you can't even climb the steps to help your kiddo down.  So yeah - I think the pencil-skirt-at-playground scenario is out.

Even if we rule out the denim pencil skirt, I think we have several other cool options.  Here are my favorites:

Reader Question: No More Jeans or Leggings! Any Other Mom Uniform Ideas?

Reader Question:

What are your suggestions for moms other than wearing jeans or legging daily? Thanks!

Cindy

Answer:

Oooo...Cindy.  You are pushing me out of my comfort zone.  As you may have guessed, I'm a big jeans/leggings girl.  But never fear, there are so many great options out there that I could drone on at length.  In fact, one could argue that this entire website is built around the concept of helping moms find their own daily uniform.  Let me highlight three easy options that are readily available now: the chino, the cargo, and the linen drawstring pant.

Strategies to Avoid Looking Pregnant Once You've Given Birth (Plus an Exercise To Banish Post-Baby Belly)

It's a common complaint: You are 6 weeks postpartum, and are proud of yourself for, (A) being out of the house and (B) having showered and applied makeup.  As you are strutting happily along, babe in tow, you eventually run into some idiot who says, "So, when are you due?"    

This situation happens to us all, and my previous coping strategy was to simply bury the incident deep in my brain, never to be thought of again.  But then one of our readers left the following comment:  

I have several tops like these [NOTE: she's referring to the floaty tops featured in our Postpartum Belly Hiding Tops post] that I wore after giving birth in May, and I was so disappointed and embarrassed when people asked me if I was pregnant. I wanted to scream...hey, not everyone looks like Heidi Klum six weeks postpartum. But then I thought maybe it also had to do with the loose floaty tops I was wearing. Any suggestions for this problem? I'm pregnant again and want to AVOID this situation in the future!

Sigh.  It's best to face this situation head-on.  So, is there anything we can do to avoid looking pregnant after we've given birth?  

The short answer is:  No.  Not really.  Our bodies just went through 9 months of crazy changes - it's not going to be undone overnight.  One O/B told me to think about it this way:  It takes 9 months for your body to get that big, it's probably going to take another 9 months for your body to go back to normal.  At least.  And as someone who got scary-big (click link then scroll down for a pic), I get it. 

There are, however, a few strategies worth trying:

Choose tops that skim over the pooch.

While I know that this silhouette can be very maternity-top, you can always rein in the fabric with a banded bottom, like Forever 21's Gale Gathered Front Tunic, $13.80. We also pictured a several of these types of tops in our first and second Hide the Postpartum Pooch posts, if you need more ideas.

Show some cleavage. 

Typically, postpartum boobs are still huge, whether you are nursing or not.  And if you are nursing, well...they are epic.  Nothing makes you look bigger than big boobs, all covered up in fabric.  So choose a deep v-neck, cowl, or a large scoop neck.  Anything that shows some cleavage.  Again, the Gale Gathered Front Tunic does a nice job of both camouflaging the pooch and showing some cleavage.

Disguise the Pooch In a Pattern.

Look for patterns that are a bit busy and asymmetrical.  I know that sounds horrible.  Admittedly, it's hard, but not impossible, to find busy, asymmetrical patterns that are cute. The goal is distraction.  

Florals are huge for Spring, and I'm loving Forever 21's Tropical Floral Top, $15.80.  It has a banded bottom, a low neckline, and a busy, asymmetrical pattern to disguise a postpartum pooch.  Wow - it hits all three strategies.  So if the sight of your fantastic cleavage isn't enough to draw the eye up, all of that floral goin' on will nicely camouflage the pooch.

Try Some High-Waisted Jeans

I know you are thinking, WHAT?????  But consider this:  your postpartum pooch is very, very soft.  It's really just extra skin and lots of...jelly-like stuff.  Ugh.  But the good news is that it squishes down quite a bit.  Zipping it up into a pair of high-waisted jeans helps keep it under control, and gives you a bit of support that will actually feel good 6 weeks postpartum. Really.  You want the high waist tight, but not so tight you can't breathe.

These jeans are a bonus for c-section girls: many low-waisted jeans can irritate your very sensitive scar.  High-waisted jeans were the only thing I could wear for months (besides sweatpants, obviously), and to this day, there are times when my scar still gets irritated and I pull them back out.  Ahhhh....relief.

Just because you have high-waisted jeans doesn't mean you need to show off the high waist until you are ready (read:  have lost the jelly-belly).  Just pull tops down over the high waist.  No one will be the wiser.  Since high-waists have been around a while (the fashion mags seem to love/hate them every 6 months), they are currently really easy to find, and often on sale.  Personally,  I really liked Seven For All Mankind's High Waist Bootcut Jean, $196 at shopbop.com.

Try the Tupler Exercises

WIth many pregnancies,the outmost halves of the abdominal muscles seperate a bit, making it hard for you to regain your pre-baby belly.  Doing the right kind of abdominal exercises mays help.   Julie Tupler, RN developed an exercise (the Tupler Technique) that can help women pull these muscles back together.  Medline has a great interview with Julie Tupler (with her instructions on the exercise), but for a quick synopsis of just the exercise, go to Fit Pregnancy's article.  

Wrap Up the Belly

 Julie Tupler recommends wrapping your belly in her Tupler Diastais Rehab Splint, $35 (pictured at right), or you could always try the Belly Bandit Bamboo, $66 (pictured at left).  Both products pictured are from Becoming Mothers in Boulder, CO.  The Tupler Splint helps target the the seperated muscles specifically, while the Belly Bandit helps reduce uterine swelling, water retention and offers back support.  

For an even more affordable approximation, you can always try a simple Ace Bandage.  Ask the hospital for one before you leave - they'll give you one for free.  I wore mind daily for several weeks.  I don't know if it reduced uterine swelling or helped with my diastais, but I do know it made life much more bearable, helped support my aching body, and hid the pooch a bit.  Next time around I might try the Belly Bandit.  It fits nice and low, and looks like a c-section girl's best friend.  

So hopefully this will help avoid any awkward, "Are you STILL pregnant? Oops - there's the baby!" situations in the future.  But probably not.  Just remember:  pooch or not, your baby is pretty darn sure you are the most gorgeous thing he (or she) has ever seen.  

xo,

S

Reader Question: What To Wear To A Country Bar (With a Mechanical Bull)

Question:

I have a friend's birthday party at the end of the month. We are celebrating at a country bar-- the kind that has a mechanical bull and everything. She is turning 33 (I am 28) and she's the friend who I always go to for fashion advice (since I have no clue when it comes to that). WWYW? (What Would You Wear, haha. :)

Tegan

Answer:

Tegan - Obviously my first thought was daisy-dukes, cowboy boots and a triangle bikini top.  I'm thinking pink gingham. 

No?  Really?  Ok.

Can You Recommend Cool, Winter Slip-On Shoes For Moms With Young Babies?

Reader Question:

Can you recommend some good, winter slip-on shoes for moms with young babies?

I loved your sneakers post, but when I have a baby strapped to me or clinging to one arm and a purse in the other, I just can't bend over to tie my shoes. For the same reasons, my zip up boots are getting more and more tiresome.

So, I'm looking for cool, comfortable slip-on shoes with full winter coverage (in other words, ballet flats just aren't going to cut it - no socks or tops of the feet visible please). I've been looking at the Privo Nahla and the Keen Charleston, but it's so hard to tell.

Any advice?

Thanks!

-Jess in Seattle

Answer:

Jess, I have to be honest:  I was skeptical.  You are looking for the Holy Grail of Mom Shoe.  You are looking for a shoe that is flat, comfortable, slip-on and stylish, while providing the coverage of a short boot.  [snort]  My first thought?  Good luck.

But, I do love a good challenge.  And while I won't claim that my picks below are the cutest shoes in the world....they are growing on me.  So here we go....

First off, thank you for providing an example of what you are looking for.  The Privos and Keens you mentioned are pictured below.  I don't love either of these shoes.  They aren't horrible, but I think we can do better.

 

Can Sequins Be Worn Past New Year's Eve?

Reader Question:

Hi!  I bought a couple of fun tops for the holidays, and my question is - can I wear sequins after New Year's? I have a friend's 30th coming up, and wondering if I can still pull it off. Thanks!

Answer:

I have a tendency to ignore traditional fashion "rules" (I wear white after labor day, mix black, brown and navy, wear gold and silver jewelry together) so take my advice with a grain of salt...but YES.  Not only do I love sequins as a going-out look year-round, but I love mixing them into daytime looks.

EX:  I met my friend Amber for lunch the other day, and she was wearing a little sequined cardigan underneath an army green fatigue jacket.  [Sigh of bliss]  I also love a little scarf with sequins for dressing up a plain daytime outfit. 

But back to your question.  For going out, fun sequin tops will always look amazing with jeans and killer heels, but I'm also loving sequin tops with man-style trousers.  And killer heels (but you knew that already). 

For inspiration, here are some old photos from jcrew.com.  J.Crew has been rocking the high-low look lately, combining sequins with casual khakis, jeans, etc. 

Can You Recommend More Tops and Belly Hiding Tips For Postpartum Moms?

Reader Question:

Hello Shana,
 
Since I found your blog through Baby Bunching last week, I've been obsessed and some of the highlights of my past week have been finding new posts each morning. I've devoured every bit of your blog, love your fashion sense and advice, and desperately need your help!
 
You posted a great article, "Dressing Your Postpartum Pouch on The Cheap" and I was wondering if you'd consider creating an updated version of that. Because I never got around to losing all the baby weight after my first child was born Sept '07, it's been harder for me to lose the weight from my second child's birth this past April. I'm feeling pretty portly and because I'm still nursing (partially in hopes of burning more calories to skinny down!!) my "ladies" are ENORMOUS and make me look even heavier than I should. I've always been a size 6 and am now more of a 10/12 (sigh) so I've held off buying new clothes until I can get into my old things. However, I'm beginning to think my friends and neighbors think I'm becoming a bag lady as I bum around in my maternity jeans. (I know that's a HUGE no-no so I'm taking your advice about the premium Gap jeans and I'm on the way to the mall tonight to purchase a pair in whatever size I can fit on my body.)
 
All that said, my request of you,my dear, is to provide whatever guidance and suggestions you can to help me glam up a bit and look as fabulous as my wonderful husband and beautiful daughters believe I am. I truly appreciate your consideration.
 
Many thanks,
Heather

Answer:

Heather, thank you so much for your lovely note!  Am so glad to hear that you have been enjoying reading our posts as much as we enjoy writing them.

We, of course, would love to help!  First off - a quick note on maternity jeans, post partum: if they still look fantastic, the keep wearing 'em.  The problem is...most maternity jeans are made with much more stretch than normal jeans (to accommodate our changing bodies) and once our pregnancy is over, things start to shift.  Most maternity jeans simply don't fit quite right once the babe is out.  If yours do (and if they do, let me know - I'm hoping that a holy grail of maternity jean exists somewhere) then keep wearing them. But, I suspect, like most maternity jeans, they probably give you a saggy, saggy bum.  Not your best look.  :)

On to the tops!