Ain't No Mom Jeans

Help! A Reader Needs Emergency Styling Advice For Valentine's Day!

Reader Question:  

Hi Shana & Molly,

I have recently discovered your blog and I have been loving it ever since.  Each time I read a post it reminds me that it is possible to be a mom and at the same time, a person (I think you know what I mean here).   I am a mom to one 15 month old son, and his birth and first few months of life were pretty traumatizing to me, and by this I mean I was essentially a basket case in pajamas for 3 months.   Yes, I know this happens to everyone, but I took it....HARD.  I couldn't figure out how to be Enzo's mom, but still be myself.  I was not that embarrassed to admit I kind of wanted to return to work so I would have a reason to get up, blow dry my hair, and pull it together!  I didn't realize how much I loved my job and the feelings of accomplishment I had surrounding my professional work.  In any case, thanks for your blog, it is a great reminder that many moms experience the same challenges.  And your writing is hilarious!

My style challenge is my V-Day date with the hubs.  Let me preface this by saying....I. NEVER. SEE. MY HUSBAND.  I have a high stress job in HR for a luxury hotel company, and my husband works 2 jobs at all hours of the night and day to make ends meet.  Literally all hours.  The only time I see my husband, I am wearing a suit (work requires), or pajamas.  Not my top choices, people.  And I am pretty sure not his.  Especially if you see my pajamas.  Since our V-Day date (observed on the 12th due to aforementioned insane work schedules) is a much anticipated special night, I would really like to wow him.  Here is where the problem comes in.  We have decided to go bowling, and then out to dinner.  Bowling you say?  Believe it or not my husband and I have never been bowling together, even in 3 years of dating and another 3.5 years of marriage.  He's foreign, I'm an awful bowler, he works nights & weekends, you do the math. 

 

Now HOW, pray tell, does one dress for the romantic ambiance of Valentine's Day, bowling, and dinner out at a semi-decent restaurant with tablecloths - all wrapped up into one?  Any cute outfit I can muster in my mind (usually involving skinny jeans and boots) only transitions to utterly ghastly once I picture myself in those damn bowling shoes!  I want something that will be comfortable enough to bowl in, while still remaining sexy and date-nite-esque which I can confidently wear at a restaurant we can't afford.  I also thought about a sweater-dress (for some reason my husband really likes these, he bought me three for xmas), but still the problem with the bowling shoes/curvy hips is even more exaggerated with no jeans to hide the shoes and balance the hips.  My last resort is a post-bowl wardrobe change.  Any last minute pointers or suggestions? 

Katie

Answer:

Katie, thanks so much for your kind words and for writing in!  So glad you and hubs will be celebrating Valentine's together.  And bowling + unaffordable restaurant?  Totally a night to remember, LOL!  

I myself have been on many a bowling date-night.  Denver has that LA transplant Lucky Strike which is a bowling alley/nightclub and it IS a fun date night.  Like you, I am also a terrible, terrible bowler, and irrationally competitive when bowling, which leads me to Tip #1:  Drink.

But what to wear?  There are two options that immediately come to mind:

 

 

Option 1 - Hide the Shoes with Flares

Flares will help to hide those horrible bowling shoes.  But bring a few safety pins (or duct tape) so you can pin/tape up your hem.  When bowling is over, release the hem, bust out the sexy shoes and be on your way!

 

DateNight by aintnomomjeans featuring plunging neckline tops

 

That's the safe option.  But my favorite.....

Shop Your Closet: Go Leggy in the Winter With Layered Tights

Sunday was my birthday.  So on Thursday night, my dear friend Kirsten (aka Dr. Kiki) and I went out for drinks.  Kirsten and I have been friends since my days in D.C. and it's only by happy coincidence that she's living in Philly for a short time.  It was a much needed girl's night, Mamas.  A much needed girls night.  (And my Denver girls, I miss you so!!)

Girl's nights have been so scarce since our move from Denver (ahem - big sacrifice here, Mike...HUGE...)  so frankly, the boys were a tad confused as to what was actually happening.  Mom is going out?  Without us?  And without Dad??  But that is crazytown!!  WHY would she do this??? OMG WHAT IS HAPPENING?

So as I was about to leave, there were suddenly books to be read....pictures were drawn and discussed...

7 Style Resolutions for Moms in 2012

Ok Mamas, whether or not you are a resolution person (and I am...in a big, obnoxious way)...I've put together a list of my top 7 mom-style resolutions for 2012.  

So repeat after me:  I, Mama... 

(See? I warned you about my obnoxious thing)

1.  ...will buy one pair of fabulous everyday shoes (or boots).  

And wear them - everyday.  Because shoes matter.  Shoes make the outfit.  But these will not be sensible shoes, oh, no.  These will not be shoes that "match" everything in my closet.  They will not be black because I already have a black bag.  They will not be brown simply because I already have black.

They will be whatever color makes my heart beat fast (and that might be black or brown, but I vow to think outside the shoebox).  They will have gorgeous details.  They will make me happy.  And I won't even think about bringing them home unless they are also comfortable.  I will be incredibly picky, and wait (all year if I have to) until I find the perfect pair.

Mamas, to illustrate, look how even Garnet Hill figured out that gorgeous footwear is the chic-outfit cornerstone.  Both outfits are cute on their own, but the footwear makes them amazing.

 

(photo credits: garnet hill) 

Give Away | Shabby Apple's Gorgeous Lace Hollywood Hills Dress

*****UPDATE:  Giveaway Closed!  Congrats to Janice!!*****

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Mamas, I went on a date.  A real one.  Where a babysitter comes to the house, the kids are excited to see her, and Mike and I walk out the door without a backwards glance - OR the baby.  I'm in high heels and he's wearing a jacket.  Like adults.  Like real parents.  It was fabulous.

I had been dreaming of this date all week.  I had just received Shappy Apple's Hollywood Hills dress in the mail (OMGOMGOMG so gorgeous!!)....and promptly rushed out to buy some Spanx.

A side note:  My husband was oddly excited to hear I was going to wear Spanx.  All was revealed later, when I realized that all he heard was something that sounded vaguely like "spanking"....and was then horribly disappointed to realize that I meant these:

They rocked, BTW. And sooo comfortable.

Anyway, the night of the date was freezing.  Like 20 degrees, it's probably going to snow, freezing.  And no matter how cute an outfit, I don't really sacrifice comfort for style.  At least not in 20 degree weather.  But I also wasn't going to pass up on this dress.  So I got a little creative - swapped booties for stilettos, busted out a sparkly little belt....

(wearing: Shabby Apple Hollywood Hills dress c/o Shabby Apple, J.Crew sweater and belt, Hanes run-resistant sheer tights c/o Hanes, Nine West booties, vintage clutch)

Eclectic, I realize.  But I was warm, and felt like myself, which is really the important thing.  

But never fear, Mamas.  Two martinis in (two!  TWO!!) and I was shedding clothing like a crazy-woman.

The dress got its time to shine.

Here I am, waiting for a glass of champagne to wrap up the most perfect evening.  I'm sure my mother is dying over the fact that I'm revealing what I drank (how un-ladylike of me!!  scandalous!!) but I haven't been able to stomach more than a glass or two of white wine since getting pregnant with Raines.  Which means that I've been drinking only white wine for almost 5 YEARS NOW.  And suddenly, seemingly overnight, I can do martinis again. 

It was a big night, Mamas.  A big night indeed.  Martinis, high heels, a gorgeous lace dress and lipstick.  I haven't felt this glamorous in quite a long, long time.

So.  As our final giveaway in this Season of Giving, we've teamed up with the very fabulous folks at Shabby Apple to offer up a lace Hollywood Hills dress to one of our lucky readers.  

That would be one of you, Mamas.  

So if you are in need of a little glamour in your life, and want it in the form of a shockingly comfortable lace dress that feels both demure and wildly sexy....do any of the following and leave us a comment, telling us how you've entered:

1.  Like Shabby Apple on Facebook

2.  Share this post on Facebook 

Good luck, Mamas!!  I hope you are all enjoying this special (and crazy) time of the year.  Amazing that it's almost over.  I need to get going on the cookie baking.

(And guess who is having a baby, uh...Monday?  Talk about one heck of an amazing Christmas gift.  Lucky M.)

xoxo

S

Reader Question: Red Cocktail Dress, Styled 5 Different Ways

Reader Question:

I have been thinking about the company Christmas Party my husband's work throws each year.  The dress code is semi formal AND family friendly (read-bring the toddler and baby along for some Santa time).  How in the world does a mom pull off semi-formal mom-style?

The other obstacles- a tight budget and a mindful husband. When I told him I had started looking at dresses  and outfit ideas he asked me, "What's wrong with the one you wore last year?" Um, I wore it last year.  And it is red.  It is my only semi-formal occasion-worthy article of clothing.

I'm sure I can convince him that a new dress is a good idea, especially if I get something like a LBD that I can change the look of with accessories.  But if I can't afford a new dress, what can I do to change up the one I already have?  I wore a black cropped cardigan with it last year since it was December and I had a brand new baby bump growing.

This is me in the dress.  It hits just above the knees and is not so tight it reveals pooch, but is fitted for a flattering shape.  Hopefully it gives you something to work with.  Did I mention I love the color?

Any ideas?

Thanks a bunch!

Ashley

Answer:

Ashley - What a cute family pic!  I love that the little one has such a scowl on his face - so cute!!  

Your question was the one that inspired our Holiday Cocktail Dresses for Moms roundup.  There are some ah-mazing dresses to choose from this season.  BUT...in the event that you decide to get a little creative with your existing wardrobe, here's a bit of inspiration.

One note:  In the upcoming collages, I purposely picked a dress that I found a bit....boring.  I'm trying to show that even a plain dress can look gorgeous with the right accessories.  

Holiday Cocktail Dresses For Moms

As I was perusing the web, attempting to answer a reader's question about her upcoming holiday party (more on that later), I couldn't help but find some gorgeous cocktail dresses that would be perfect for moms.  On the off chance that some of you are living fabulous lives that involve high heels, cocktail parties, and babies that sleep...I thought I'd share my finds.

psst:  Does anyone else love this all-white look as much as I do?  It's actually this shirt and this tulle skirt from Shabby Apple.  Genius!  And also comes in black (shirt and skirt).

Nursing-Friendly Holiday Dresses

We've had several requests for nursing-friendly holiday dresses.  Which, as many of you know, is easier said then done.  Most festive holiday fabrics (silk, lace, anything shiny) have very little give and therefore are tough to nurse in - even if the neckline is low.  The best nursing-friendly dresses have a stretchy neckline - something with jersey, perhaps, so they easily pull down to nurse.  However, these dresses can often look too casual.  Finding something dressy (or that can be dressed up) and nursing-friendly is key.

(City of Lights dress, $178 and Miramar Dress, $368 both from Anthropologie)

Another pitfall?  The wrap dress.  These often appear nursing friendly, but in reality, many require partial unwrapping for full nursing access to 'the girls'.  Um.  Awkward.

Lastly....bras.  As in, we need them.  Milk is heavy.

So.  If you are in the market for a nursing-friendly holiday dress, keep the following in mind:

1.  Find dresses in stretchy fabrics.

2.  If you want a wrap dress, be sure that it's drapey enough to allow nursing access without having to re-tie.

3.  Be sure you can wear a bra (BTW - a strapless bra is very easy to nurse in...but be sure you have one that fits properly).

Here are some of my favorites for a bit of inspiration.....

 

Librarian Style For Moms

Gang, remember Amy of BiblioMOMia?  Last time she wrote for us, she schooled us in Southern Gal Style.  But she's also an academic working on her PhD in literature.  (SO freakin' cool!!)  So when we recieved Shannon's Mom Street Style submission and read that Shannon defined her style as "punk librarian"...well.  I knew BiblioMOMia would get a kick out of it.  And, if we were lucky, be inspired.

And she was.  And we are.  So here's Amy....

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I might have spit out my coffee when I read “punk librarian.”  So cool!  And, I must say, Shannon totally rocked the edgy nerd vibe in her mix of floral and leather, especially with those amazing purple tights.  The floral dress is definitely something a librarian might wear, but she makes the whole outfit more interesting with the moto jacket and tough boots - yet keeps a quirky feel with the bright tights.  But her email made me start thinking - what is librarian style?  Why do I love it so much?  And how can it work not just in my professional life but in my life as a mom too? 

Like “secretary” with its pumps and pencil skirts, “librarian” has definitely evolved into a style inspiration.  Somehow, even adding one or two of these elements makes the whole outfit feel just a bit more bookish - a bit buttoned-up, a bit feminine, a lot intellectual.   Try adding one of these things to your style arsenal!  A little goes a long way, so don’t wear too many of these at once - you’ll look like you’re wearing a costume instead of a cool outfit.  

Librarian Style Elements

• Floral prints.  Sweet and old-fashioned and feminine, floral prints always remind me of dusty books (in a good way).
• Textured fabrics (lace, tweed, leather, velvet).  Very Victorian, and very librarian.  And, most of the time, very soft!
• Librarian shoes (t-straps, oxfords, loafers, granny boots).  If it looks like a teacher might have worn it in 1915, it’s a librarian shoe.  Luckily, there are tons of these styles out right now, to fit every taste and budget.
• High bun.  Have you ever tossed your hair high on your head (and maybe used a pencil to keep it there)?  I dare you to do it and not feel like a librarian!  It’s an easy and flattering hair style for pretty much every face shape, too.
• Glasses.  Ummmm...obviously.  Any kind of glasses, from tiny wire rims to chunky black frames.  Even better if you put them on the tip of your nose and peer over them.
• Structured jackets.  Wool blazer.  Velvet jacket.  Tweed vest.  All of those jackets are definitely librarian-ish.  A flattering and structured jacket is totally feminine, too.
• Funky legwear.  I don’t know why I associate patterned tights and great leggings with librarians - maybe because all of my library science friends in school had great tights?  Either way, they’re often a great way to add some funky and whimsical style to an otherwise classic outfit.

There are a million ways to incorporate librarian style into outfits you’re probably already wearing, and things you probably already own.  A little goes a long way!  Shannon mentioned “punk librarian” as her style aesthetic - it’s amazing what happens when you add floral and leather to the same outfit.  However, it’s just as easy to add some bookish flair to jeans and tees. Here are my favorite options, with some outfit ideas.

 

Mom Street Style - Shannon's Budget Friendly Date Night Look

Mamas, I love a success story.  And helping moms feel hot?  Our definition of success!  Shannon was nice enough to send in this rockin' pic of herself after doing a bunch of Ain't No Mom Jeans reading.  Shannon wrote:

Hi there,
I absolutely LOVE Ain't No Mom Jeans! I Googled "cool mom style blog" about a month ago because I needed help getting out of my style rut with my extremely limited budget. I put together this outfit when my husband and I went out for a date night. I thought it was cute when I put it on, but when I saw the picture he took of me, I said, "Dang! I look hot!" And almost all of it was bought for 75% off at Target. I would've never identified my personal style as "punk librarian" if not for you guys. Thank you!

Shannon in Charlotte, NC

Dress - Target
Pleather jacket - Target
Tights - Target
Boots - Marshalls, from a few years ago
Earrings - Aldo 

I LOVE that Shannon went through our personal style exercise and came up with Punk Librarian.

Coolest. Style. Assessment. Ever.

Shannon, thank you SO much for writing in!!  You look totally hot.  And I love seeing what can be done on a budget - 75% off at Target?  Whoa - nice work!

xo,

S

 

Reader Question(s): A Gorgeous "Uniform" For All of Your Upcoming Weddings and Parties (Even Holiday Parties!)

Gang, we gotten several reader questions about upcoming parties and events.  Some of you will be attending outdoor weddings, some of are dreading the office holiday party, and one of you just wanted to know when it's OK to wear tall leather boots to a fancy event.

(photo credit: This gorgeous pic of my dear friends Josh & Amber was taken by Denver-based Laura Dombroski Photography.)

So.  Here's a Fall wedding formula, one that can easily take you through the whole holiday season (even the dreaded office party).